Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. (Col 3:18-21).
Today we face various challenges in our quest to raise godly homes. Most of these challenges we face can actually be prevented if we decide to run our families the way God intended it to be. God established the home and stated clearly how it should be managed. He gave different roles to individual parties in the home. I believe that God gave the man the leadership role in the home, as a husband and father. If this is the case, how then can a man fulfill his leadership role in the home? There are about three ways I believe a man can fulfill his leadership role in the home.
God expects you as a man to be a strong leader in your home:
It is not the will of God for a man to be weak in leading his home. You should be a strong leader, as strong as Adolf Hitler. Highly purposeful, well determined and very able to put your leg down and stand for the Godly values expected of us as believers in Christ. God said he is interested in Abraham because he knows he will command his house to obey God’s instruction. God wants you to be a kind of a man after God’s heart, who knows what God wants and is taking the responsibility to lead his family to follow God’s way without compromise.
God expects you as a man to be a strong leader who will lead with love: it is the will of God for you to be a strong leader in the home who will lead with love. This is the challenging aspect to men. is not possible for men to be strong and firm and at the same time be loving tender. But this is what God is asking of us as men. He said “husbands, love your wives” and He also said “fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged”. This requires a tender love from the man. How then can a man strongly lead with love? To do this you must have a very close fellowship with Jesus. This kind of love is born in you in the place of personal communion with Christ. Jesus Christ is a perfect loving leader. And as a man you are to be like Him.
3.God expects you as a man to be a strong, loving leader who leads strategically:
I believe God wants you to develop a strategy to lead your home. You should do this by finding out what God’s will for the home is. What does God want every home to be and do? After discovering this, you will now form a strategy to fulfill it in your own home in order to raise a home that is Godly. Determine and write down the mission, vision and value statement for your family. Then come up with plans and strategies (what you will be doing and when you will be doing them and how you will be doing them), to fulfill this vision and produce these values in the home. For instance to build close fellowship and loving friendship in your home, you may schedule different times for all family members to be together. You should be innovative about this and plan according to what is available to you. Your goal is not to show off but to build up. Be focused and consistent. Know what you want and go for it. Know where you are going and lead your entire family there even if they don’t know the place yet. This is leadership.
In conclusion I want you to know that true leadership is not taking people from where they are to where they want to be, neither is it taking people from where they are to where you want them to be. Rather, true leadership is taking people from where they are to where they ought to be. Therefore you should know that true Godly leadership is all about taking people from where they are to where God wants them to be. This is your call as a man at home. Be a Godly leader. Find out where and what God wants your family to be and take them there. Seek God’s grace for this, though it is difficult but it is possible with God in your life. Shalom.